Follow me on Twitter THR is reporting that Universal’s quest to ruin everything continues and involves Stretch Armstrong being played by Taylor Lautner. Stretch Armstrong, if you recall, was a mildly popular toy with stretchy appendages. It wasn’t a cartoon or a movie, just a stretchy doll that was fun for 10 mins tops, 15 if you cut it open and played with the stuff on the inside. Sigh. Anyway Taylor Lautner is set to star as Stretch in Stretch Armstrong 3D. Lautner is famous for not wearing a shirt and being in Twilight: New Moon. The “story” for this movie is as follows:
The story developed for the movie, being produced by Imagine and Hasbro, sees an uptight spy who stumbles across a stretching formula, which he takes and must now adjust to in everyday life and when fighting crime. (THR)
This whole story depresses me too much to even make terrible jokes about him being able to stretch certain parts, or it being a stretch to turn a toy into a movie. Look for this stinker in 2012.
